ABOUT

Whether you found this page from an event, a friend, or a desperate 2am Google search—I'm glad you're here. You're probably here because parenting is hard, really hard and parenting a challenging child requires you to show up even when everything in you wants to quit. Here you'll find practical ways to Play Hurt when you're running on empty, tools for building relational resilience, and resources for loving your hard kids well. You don't have to do it all—just pick one thing. You don't have to be perfect. You just have to keep showing up. Please know your pain matters, and so do you.

Small Ways to Keep Showing Up

  • Delight Challenge

    Find one moment to “shine your face” on your kid. Even if they don't deserve it. Even if they just threw a fit. Look them in the eye , smile and let them see that you're glad they're yours. 30 seconds. That's playing hurt.

  • The Translator

    Next time your kid acts out, pause and say to yourself: 'They're not giving me a hard time, they're having a hard time.' Their right brain is in protection mode. Then respond from that place. You might still need to set a boundary, but you're playing hurt instead of reacting from your wound.

  • The Text

    Text another parent who's struggling. Just: 'Hey, I see you. You're doing hard things. I'm proud of you.' That's you helping someone who is playing hurt. Helping someone know they're not alone.

  • The SOS

    When you are in need, send a SOS text to someone who can relate and who I hope, will pray for you and check back in on you. It is okay to get help when you are hurting. Not just okay, imperative.

  • The Declaration

    When you want to quit (and you will), say out loud: 'I'm not done.' Say it in the bathroom. Say it in your car. Say it to God. Then get up and do the next thing. That's playing hurt.

  • The Reframe

    When you see the quills come out, remind yourself: 'Those quills are protection, not rejection. This child is scared, not mean.' You can still enforce consequences, but you're playing hurt when you refuse to take their behavior personally.

  • The Essential Self Care

    Do one small thing for yourself because YOU matter. Take a 5-minute walk. Drink your coffee while it's hot. Playing hurt doesn't mean running yourself into the ground—it means remembering you're worth showing up for too. Get the help you need. Go to the resource page for more helpful options.